Shining light through the ordinary things in life helps create awareness and beauty. Awareness can heal past wounds, and trauma from abandonment feelings.
Our brains keep memories and our bodies keep score.
Your past is your past, but your mind processes random entering thoughts inefficiently, without using an organized filing system (where yesterday’s past can be mixed into today’s thoughts like spaghetti strands in today’s meal).
I know from my past that past abandonment thoughts that hadn’t yet healed can quickly muddy your current thoughts and actions.
Resurfacing pain-filled memories can do damage.
Abandonment Is a Spectrum
Abandonment can be one of those fuzzy and invisibly damaging memories that you may not know you have or are holding onto if you your family stayed intact. That’s my recollection.
On one end of the spectrum, if you grew up in a foster system or were physically abandoned by a parent, that would no question hurt who you were growing up and you possibly still carry hurt in who you are now.
On the other end, if you had small injuries you couldn’t put a label on with one defining incident, that can actually hurt you more because in the invisible (unconscious) you don’t know you need healing.
And if you have unattended wounds, one day, you can get triggered and start snapping at your partner or a close person, subconsciously displacing your emotions, and blaming the wrong person for leaving you or ignoring your wants.
If you’re aware, you realize that how you behaved has nothing to do with them, but all about you and your past!
Psychotherapist, Susan Anderson wrote in a Huffington Post article, that you could have any of these damaging 40 post-trauma effects that include lingering insecurity, anxiety, and shame.
That was my discovery in a nutshell.
In my childhood, I was invisible. That was my an identity memory I held into my 20s. And the wound left was feeling unworthy… Continue reading “Turn Past Abandonment Into Healing Growth”