Healthy Happy Life Secrets

Guilt Replacements For Happiness

Guilt is not a good feeling. But subtle, it’s often missed and takes away from happiness. So recognizing it exists in your life is helpful so you can then replace the lesser feelings with higher ones.

Guilt shows up in so many different ways in each of our unique lives.

But in common, so often guilt arises from the upbringing ingrained in you from childhood.

It’s not easy to shake off.

Early on, you were limited in the changes you could make. But today you can and should make the necessary changes for a happy life that free you and make you unstoppable.

Because guilt can have a dark cloud grip on your life.

I realized this in my own life…

When I was younger, I enjoyed reading. And I felt guilty being cooped up inside under a reading light instead of playing outside.

I felt disciplined but I also felt the pressure to be a more social kid.

So I was at odds about enjoying learning when it wasn’t cloudy outside.

Then all grown up, I looked back and realized I love learning and growth that I had set myself up to do from a young age.

And today I’m still all about personal development that to me is living life to the fullest potential.

And I’m sure when you look back in your life, you can see some of the sacrifices you made that help you today!

Even though while going through those times, it probably didn’t feel that way.

It felt like pressure.

That’s where you and I learned and felt the concept of guilt from an early age.

And in Brene Brown’s Daring Greatly, she teaches that guilt is behavior-based and feeling like “I did something bad” while shame is identity-related and “I am bad”.

Both live in the mind but are changeable in our thoughts.

But guilt subtly creeps up in today’s thoughts. And the dots are not connected to the root.

…And that robs daily joy.

It’s not easy to let go of those guilt feelings from the past that apply to your situations today.

And if you were able to le-go of the ego then that would be easy.

But none of us can do that as part of our makeup and built-in equipment.

The ego (or my new made up French word l’ego) can play any of us all day in our thoughts if we allow.

Like in the example I gave of…

When it’s nice weather outside, I still feel those initial guilty feelings that I should be outside.

That developed in my inner child.

I initially almost wish that it were rainy or cloudy out so I didn’t have to worry I’ll regret or miss a beautiful day.

And something as simple as that is how the brain can get stuck if allowed.

But wiser and more evolved, I take those feelings and replace them with better ways and thoughts, so I feel accomplished no matter where I am… indoor or out.

I change my perspective with my thoughts.

I find something positive about my choice.

It’s a fight with the split mind (that we all have), but replacing those lesser thought-feelings with something better and higher is how to change those ways without looking back.

…And make decisions quicker without second guessing.

You learn that your mind is not always your friend.

There’s you.

…And then there’s your mind.

That’s in your body.

So aware on that (as observer to my thoughts), today when I’m inside on a full blue sky day, I crack open my back door so that I can feel the inside-outside living.

Problem solved.

And I give those guilty feelings an ‘ol heave-ho back seat.

They no longer exist until they pop back up another time. And then I’ll rinse and repeat the same or find an even better way.

It keeps getting better until the guilt no longer has you.

That’s aspiring, yes? 😊

And well, I know since you and I have the same human mind instrument, you can do the same for your guilt areas!

…Where you already have all the answers inside you to change them to positive or loving thoughts.

So, now to make yourself aware, all you’ve got to do is figure out: what areas in your life do you hold guilt for?

Because they’re there.

And when you bring them to view when you’re not impacted, you are prepared to address them when they show up again. You’ve got this!

It probably takes a ‘lil intentional thinking initially, but if you can capture what you are still holding onto as guilt, you’re well on your way to replacing them and putting them to rest.

And how I concretely know that for you (as well as me) is that our ego is where these fuzzy areas are lost and stored.

That’s clear so you and I can be on guard.

And when the triggers and thoughts are brought back in the same fuzzy manner, you can de-fuzz them at the gate!

We all have an ego (just like we all have a brain) and it never goes away. And we can protect ourselves from the daily damage.

Keeping our thoughts healthy is the way to empowered happiness.

And awareness is always the first step.

So on that best self-aware intention, if your lingering guilt is from not doing something where you had been asked to, another good step is to ask yourself: why don’t I want to do that?

Because doing what others want you to do isn’t always your best.

Usually there’s a good reason for you choosing or wanting to choose another route. Because you and your inner self know better what you need in your life.

And sometimes at odds, you don’t know why you made some choices until you look back.

Trust yourself and signs you get in this life as life tries to route and re-route you. For Your Best.

That’s the better way than doing everything you plan out of fear or a roadmap someone else laid out for you.

Getting over the guilt of letting others down is sometimes all that is needed from you to get past feeling bad… that can easily cross into the boundaries of shame.

…Or lead to a pity party.

Clearly and intentionally justifying your reasons turn the love back to you and makes whatever you end up doing even more compelling-worthwhile.

Because you and your ideas are worthy and should never be discounted because of others.

And you should always be able to look at yourself in the mirror and say, “I am worthy” no matter what’s going on around you.

That could be a good place to start.

And you can make what you choose (sometimes against what others say) to be your greatest weapon advantage.

Replacing your guilt feelings becomes your new-next growth level.

You teach yourself to evolve into better and higher ways that helps your life. And helps you not miss a daily happy beat.

That’s the next level challenge to beat.

And if I can do it, I know you can also rise to the occasion.

Living happy and with no regrets in mind is worth the effort.

And always remember, you and your life are worth it! 🎉

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Cupcake Low-Sugar Recipe (Easy For Any Occasion)

Cupcake is a comfort dessert that somehow isn’t as catchy as they once were in simpler dessert times (from my cupcake history memory).

But in my dessert world, I still think cupcakes are great… and maybe you do too 🧁 if you like simple sweets! And the ones here are low-sugar.

The low-sugar cupcake recipe below is for easy, foolproof cupcake that’s as easy as a cake mix box… but substitutes in more healthy baking ingredients without sacrificing taste or texture!

That’s exciting to me. Because cupcakes and I go waaaayy back. They remind me of grade school when someone’s mom sent their child to school with homemade cupcakes. Remember those days?

My Hi-Sugar Cupcake Journey: 🍥

I also grew up close to Georgetown near the original Georgetown Cupcakes in Washington, D.C. Then came Sprinkles. 🧁

And the chic destination cupcakeries like Magnolia Bakery that are nostalgic. And memorable for the pastel buttercream frosting. 🍥

Today of course, you can still enjoy a cupcake. And when you get a hankering, you can whip up a batch as quick as it takes to go out to get one.

Oh, and you can have these mini-cakes ready to enjoy watching Cake Week from the Great British Bake Off (#GBBO). 🇬🇧

You probably already have the cupcake ingredients in your pantry.

With healthier ingredients available to source, you can make a healthy, low-sugar cupcake version (for any occasion) that doesn’t sacrifice sweet taste or texture.

Cupcakes (that don’t get gobbled up 😋) can stay moist covered for days in the refrigerator.

That totally reminds me of an adult cupcake event in my past…

Where I took my Hi-Hats out of the fridge and to a church event. The cupcake recipe came from Martha Stewart’s Cupcake cookbook that I adore.

…And even though mine baked out of the oven looked imperfect with like low-er hi-hats, they tasted wickedly good… and I’m glad I made 2 per person.

They were a hi-hat hit.

…And that’s the beauty of cupcakes. They’re great no matter what!

So with that low-bar…

Make Your Low-Sugar Cupcake Batter:

From the same base batter, you can create white or chocolate cupcakes (or mix-n-match) where you divide up the batter. With just one ingredient (cocoa) add, you have a chocolate cupcake recipe.

That’s what cake box mixes sitting on shelves don’t want you to know. 😁

It’s an easy One-Bowl batter you can’t mess up!

Cupcakes always end up with a smooth dome top. And if you set your timer, they’re golden.

And it’s a great lazy bake or kid prepare bake because it doesn’t even matter if some of your batter bowl misses your cupcake holder.

So you can make these healthy-inspired cupcakes, relaxed with one-eye open. 😜 And no cake box mix.

You can substitute in these healthy ingredients:

Healthy Flour:

Using mostly almond flour (or another gluten-free flour like coconut or tapioca flour) and light oil (no butter needed).

The sunshin-y cupcakes below are mixed with whole wheat flour that has more fiber and protein than all-purpose or cake flour.

Because “whole” wheat ingredients preserve the bran and seed’s embryo (that has B-E vitamins and some minerals). You can B-E good.

So why not? Plus, whole wheat flour is usually around the same cost range.

Whole wheat turns out a little more beige brown but it will be covered by a cupcake glaze or frosting. And these look a little like sunflowers so they’re more wholesome and natural 🌻 And maybe attract bees.

Anti-Inflammatory Sugars:

And best of all… for this cupcake recipe, you won’t need a measuring cup for the healthy monk fruit sugar used.

Think: a little-little spoon of sugar if you use monk fruit sugar because it’s about 2.5 times more sweet tasting than refined sugar.

And many more times healthy, since it comes from an antioxidant fruit.

Then when you add a big spoonful of healthier maple syrup (or honey), these will not compromise sweetness.

And that’ll be enough sweet for the number of cupcakes in this cupcake recipe version that’s 6 of 1 or half-a-dozen of the other (as we used to say in my hotel catering days).

Or simply 6.

While baking is oven chemistry, there’s no complicated math to remember to make this cupcake recipe.

It’s either 1 or 1/2.

And for tools, all you need is a measuring cup (that has the equivalent of a 1 cup measurement). Plus a teaspoon.

And a tablespoon is handy, otherwise use 3 tsp =1 Tbsp.

I like to capitalize “T” for Tablespoon so it doesn’t get confused with little “t” t-spoon (teaspoon). That’s how I handwrite them down on index cards.

For easy amount size remembrance: the diameter is a half-dollar (for the Tablespoon if I remembered those right in the piggy bank?) or quarter size for a teaspoon.

Or convert to your country’s coin currencies.

And even easier than baking spray in paper cups is using reusable silicone cupcake holders.

Simply wash them out and then you don’t need any baking spray to prevent sticking.

They’re oven-safe for cupcakes at 350°F/180°C.

And actually safe for even higher temps.

And good news… you don’t need a mixer or a whisk (that can eat some of your batter you’ve measured out)!

Instead, you can use a spoon and sometimes I even use the Tablespoon measuring spoon.

So easy!

You’re simply combining wet and dry ingredients.

And there’s no butter to smoothly mix in so that makes it even easier.

Flavors:

Tip: Don’t leave out the capful of vanilla extract or you’ll miss the nice vanilla bakery scent.

You’ll enjoy the pre-baked aroma.

Which btw means it will be even MORE flavorful when it comes out of the magical oven on the other side.

If you want to make a chocolate cupcake batch, add 1 Tablespoon of cocoa (and a splash more milk).

For more almond flavor, add almond extract. This is great with almond flour.

Low-Sugar Frosting or Glaze

Depending on who these cupcakes are for (or what the occasion is), you have low-sugar sweet zhugh options.

You can add a low-sugar chocolate frosting without heavy cream on top after baking or chocolate melted in the best way.

Or you can add a lighter glaze…

Like on these cupcake bottoms that I turned into cake cookies.

…It’s dangerous having a bag of pistachios that can be slung onto sweet honey tops. 😊

Or you melt chocolate ontop. So many options… you can’t go wrong!

easy low-sugar cupcake duo made from almond flour recipe.

Easy Cupcake - Low-Sugar

Easy foolproof cupcake to enjoy or share.

Course Dessert

Cuisine American

Servings 6

Author Brandy @ Healthy Happy Life Secrets

Ingredients

2 egg yolks
1 cup almond flour
1/2 cup all purpose or cake flour
1/2 cup milk, plus a little more
1 tbsp neutral baking oil (light olive oil)
1 tbsp maple syrup
1 tsp almond extract
1/4 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp baking powder
pinch of kosher salt
1 tsp lemon juice or ACV (to activate baking soda and powder)

Instructions

Mix wet ingredients in one bowl. Sift in dry ingredients.
Pour into cupcake holders in cupcake tin plan about 3/4 full.
Bake at 350°F/180°C for about 20 minutes (bottoms are golden brown)

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Fasting For Gut Detox

Fasting (temporarily) is a way to do gut detox without green juices. And then appreciate preferred foods like a berry smoothie… with beet that (for me) can’t be beat.

Fasting is a practice that I’m proud of.

…I no longer freak out when I haven’t eaten. I look at not eating differently than my younger self would have.

I now know it’s healthy detox.

So now it’s my choice to fast occasionally.

And fasting is a form of empowerment.

(…And it can be for you too if you choose).

It’s a smart move.

Because living today, we are exposed to so many daily toxins like microplastics, bacteria, and pesticides.

And they end up in our gut and food.

That wreaks havoc on our gut health and how we daily feel.

So an easy way to at-home detox is to simply fast: to not eat temporarily and occasionally.

Fasting is countercultural to western world upbringings where we eat, eat, eat. And snack, snack, snack.

…Which never gives our bodies a break.

But fasting once a week or even once a month does a world of good for the body.

If you choose a day to stop eating at a certain time like 4 pm (like I do) and then resume back at 9 am the next day in time for breakfast (to break the fast), you’ll have turned your body into a healthy cleaning machine.

And it’s really not that difficult from a discipline perspective since you’re sleeping (and not eating anyway) for most the time.

It’s more about breaking old habits and mindsets.

You probably (surprisingly!) won’t even be hungry in the AM… and could even go to the afternoon or 24 hours if you had a reason.

Those additional hours of fasting reaps even more healthy body benefits.

But I find that a 16-17 hour fast is the sweet spot, doing wonders, and doesn’t disrupt my life.

Around that 17th hour mark (that’s more or less for some people), the body switches energy sources from glucose (blood sugar) to fat.

You may have heard of this process (ketosis) from the Keto Diet. But fasting is not about a Diet (with a capital “d”). Because in fasting, you’re simply not eating, temporarily.

Then when you start eating again, it’s about resuming regular eating… hopefully with healthy foods like in an anti-inflammatory food diet.

…Where the type of healthy food matters most (when eating)… much more than counting fat and protein calories, and avoiding high carbs that can cause a yo-yo diet effect.

You lose weight from not eating at all temporarily (when fasting) and not because you’re eating less carbs and calories.

And while fasting is helpful for losing weight, I don’t fast to lose weight… I do it for the healthy benefits.

It’s good for anyone.

Even thinner people (aka Vatas) like me.

…It’s like doing some cardio is good for anyone with a beating heart.

And fasting is part of a healthy lifestyle.

…And one that’s changed my life.

I no longer freak out when I haven’t eaten for some hours on a day I choose to fast.

I look at not eating totally different than I was taught growing up.

And if I have low blood sugar during the day when I’m not fasting, but because I don’t have anything in my stomach or I forgot to pack a snack, I know I’ll be fine.

…Because I know I do the same thing when I purposefully fast.

I’m not eating in both cases.

But the body doesn’t know if I’m choosing to be hungry for fasting healthy reasons or if I forgot to pack a snack.

But my calmed mind does. And I do.

As long as my mind and I know, that’s all that matters. And my body is happy with me.

I’m letting it do its full reset and cleaning job, uninterrupted.

Then the next morning, my body rewards me.

I wake up feeling refreshed… like I’d slept for days.

That’s when I’m humbly reminded of how it feels to have energy without needing cups of coffee to get going!

Without missing a beat, I’m never more excited to taste a beet smoothie 🫜and start my day.

And I know I’m not the only one. 😊

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Cabbage Wrap – Light Chicken Salad with Healthy Spices

Cabbage wrap and chicken salad is a delicious light food pairing. Great for anytime of year for losing weight, and gaining protein and fiber. And you can make your own tasty version with mustard that lasts in your lunch bag.

A cabbage wrap is great option for lunch, dinner, brunch, or an afternoon snack.

You can get a bite of sweet, savory, and crunchy in the recipe below. 🥬

Boy, I wish I knew how to make my own chicken salad when I was younger and hungry ravenous for something to eat before dinner.

It’s a snack that can be made very inexpensively and fast. Often you find grocery rotisserie chickens that are already cooked. So all you have to do is assemble. Or you can cook your own chicken breasts and even make chicken nuggets.

To shred the chicken, work along the grain pulling apart longer pieces. Then to make smaller and shorter pieces, with a sharper knife cut the long pieces straight across. Or pull the long pieces into even smaller pieces. You decide.

And you decide what goes in your chicken salad. Celery is a good pairing. And if you don’t have celery on had, lettuce pieces are also a great filler add in.

Onions and grapes are also good and healthy together in synergy. You can think of it as a superfood anti-inflammatory pairing. 🍇+🧅

Grapes bring sweetness to the chicken (or you can sub fish) cabbage wrap.

You can use red or green grapes but usually if you use red grapes, then red onion is good and green grapes with white or yellow onions for color effects.

But you do you deciding how to slice and dice up your onions and grapes.

I like the red onions because they’re more mild. If you cut the pieces small, they will not stand out …and for more fine, you can use a grater or a zester tool.

Then for seasoning I add salt and pepper. And to complement, I add a little anti-inflammatory turmeric powder.

Turmeric and black pepper together are another powerful anti-inflammatory healthy duo. 🎉 Tip: great for pain in joints!

And for tastes to further elevate the chicken salad: you can give it a lemony taste vibe with coriander. You wouldn’t want to use lemon juice here because it would be too sour and add to much liquid, and you wouldn’t want to use lemon zest because then it’s too lemony and overpowering the other tastes.

Coriander is a good dry compromise.

I like to use coriander seeds that I crush with my fingers and eat give a burst of bright lemony flavor when you bite into.

And to to give a French bistro vibe, I add tarragon from spice.

And that goes well with the mustard tastes where you have choices.

I like to lean into my Ayurvedic needs that show up in food preferences that I let decide the choice.

You can use a honey mustard for a sweeter chicken salad or a Dijon mustard to go with the French bistro tastes. Or a plain yellow mustard.

And to give a nice texture crunch 🤩, slivered almonds (or crumbled cashews) complement best with crunchy cabbage! You can also substitute with other nuts and seeds but slivered almonds crush (and in your mouth)! 🧡

Because of the vinegar acid in most mustards, it’s a practical condiment choice because it won’t go bad in room temps. Although after opened, it is better refrigerated to preserve taste.

So whatcha waitin’ for?

You can prep your chicken salad, and then put your salad to (cabbage) bed rest for tomorrow’s lunch (?). 😋

Cabbage Wrap with Healthy Lemony Spices Chicken Salad

Author Brandy @ Healthy Happy Life Secrets

Ingredients

6 oz cooked chicken, finely shredded
cabbage (Napa, red, Italian, or Bok Choy)
1 tbsp mustard
1 tbsp grapes, quartered in size
1 tbsp onions, minced
turmeric powder
salt and pepper
1 tsp coriander or lemon pepper
tarragon (optional)
slivered almonds

Instructions

Finely shred chicken and mix in remaining ingredeints.

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Easy Shrimp and Grits – 15 Minutes Healthy Spice Recipe

Shrimp and grits is one of my favorite Southern dishes. And it’s healthy! It’s a fast meal to prepare and have on the tasty food table too, anytime of day.

Because 5-minute grits cook fast (7-10 minutes on medium-high heat). You can also go for the Old Fashioned version that’s less processed and takes about 15 minutes on higher heat.

Either way, grits are a healthy corn grain and are easy to digest. They are considered good on a low FODMAP diet (like rice).

And you can’t mess up cooking grits. They are dry to begin with, so as long as there’s enough water in the skillet for cooking, you’re good to go! And even if you run low on water, you can revive your grits easier than say rice.

And you can even microwave grits without worry about texture consistency.

And shrimp and grits is a dish you can get your flavor and spices in. Grits are a great base because grits are mildly tasteless.

So, Old Bay spice blend is a great addition with paprika, celery salt and pepper already built-in as some base notes.

I douse Old Bay on anything seafood! It’s a no-brainer for me. 😊

And coriander is a good way to bring in lemony-summery notes, especially if you’re feeling summer nostalgic or your summer flew by and you wanted an endless summer. It’s a good way to preserve the enjoyable feelings.

You can also substitute with lemon pepper if coriander isn’t one you have in your stash.

I also add tarragon on the shrimp for French bistro vibes. And I add either white pepper or a mushroom spice blend for umami tasting vibes. I’m never shy on the flavors.

Tip: Keep in mind if you use spice blends, they usually have salt in them to optimize flavor, so you may not need to add any more salt. And you may have added salt in the grits while cooking.

You can add the Holy Trinity (pepper, onions, and celery) like in Cajun or Creole-style cooking for a healthy trifecta. But if you want to do less chopping and spend less time preparing this meal (like 15 minutes total), you can find diced pimento peppers (sweet) already cut like in this bowl:

If someone handed me a bowl like this and said, “enjoy” or “bless your heart,” I’d be grinning from ear-to-ear saying, “thank you and yes, ma’am.” 😋

And if you like this shrimp and grits bowl idea, you may like a 20-minute paella you can make with lobster or shrimp seafood that’s low in calories and high in protein and Omega-3 anti-inflammatory goodness. 🧡

Shrimp and Grits

Ingredients

1 cup grits, cooked
4 cups water
10-12 large shrimp
spices: tarragon, coriander, Old Bay, white pepper
coriander seeds (or lemon pepper)
Old Bay spice blend
fresh onions and peppers
cayenne (optional) for heat

Instructions

Prepare grits. Follow instructions on the package (or 1 cup of dry grits to 4 cups of water).
Add spices in grits. Spices is tasty art work so add the amount you would like.
Cook shrimp separately (or about 6-8 minutes on medium-high heat)
Arrange shrimp ontop of grits. Add more spices and fresh onions and peppers (if adding). If you're serving for others, keep some spices on the side so they can add to their tastes.

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