When I was younger I wore contact lenses. For the first few weeks, I had a subconscious fear and phobia, and I struggled to get the soft contact on my eyeball.
When I would try, my eye would blink and my eyelashes would keep the contact out of my eye.
No-contact was what I should have called the daily event that seemed like taking half an hour every day.
Years later, I realized that the reason I couldn’t get the contacts in my eyes was that I had a subconscious fear of the contact (lens) making contact with my eye.
So the blinking was not controlled by me but a body reaction to what my mind was telling my eye (mind-body connection in full swing).
From this puzzling event, I recalled that years before as a child, my eyes would sting when I tried to open them in the pool water.
Some kids could open their eyes completely underwater (I noticed with my underwater goggled protected eyes wide open).
A-ha!… with that, I made the connection to my fear… the goggles acted as eye protection and a contact lens was an intruder like the chlorinated pool water, at least in my subconscious mind (that does most of the thinking).
Knowing that insight, allowed problem-solving consciousness to emerge.
With daily practice, I consistently calmed my mind disabling my protective shell in my brain and re-writing the new story narrative to my fear and phobia that had the bold headline: “contacts are safe.”
Then that mind message was reinforced daily as I went to a 20/20 daily vision world from a framed eyeglass world.
Those subconscious positive reinforcing thoughts cut down the time to insert a contact within seconds.
Wouldn’t that be great if we could reprogram our negative thinking minds in nanoseconds?
Making visible, hidden fears through your actions
Inserting contact lenses can be a frustrating experience for many in the beginning (like it was for me).
Similarly, for so many other starting out defeats, a hidden fear or phobia can be preventing the outcome from happening.
There’s a deeper root cause for your fears.
When you can find the reasons and ways to reprogram your subconscious mind, then you can get over your fear and phobia.
Insecurity is one of those subconscious fears that can show up regularly with a knee-jerk reaction from a fear-based thought.
Another is jealousy or criticism especially if you’ve been wounded or have reason to doubt.
And these get worse if you’re Vata imbalanced. If you’re naturally Vata dominant, anxiety is your natural way that can trigger fear.
Any non-loving thought is fear-based because it comes from the brain’s ego, and if left unattended, can spin wildly out of control.
We can rewrite those subconscious fear thoughts and shadow work can be the way.
Also, others can notice from the words, actions, and reactions that happen, but the person with the ego is often blind…
It’s natural and invisible to the person unless they witness and catch the self-defeating and manipulating thoughts.
So that’s why we all have to be careful and stay aware of our own egos.
At any weak moment, a humble spirit can turn into a prideful act.
The simple act of someone cutting you off on the road can change your calm state to a riled-up one. And that can show up in a myriad of undesirable outward expressions that are unhelpful to everyone involved.
Getting off your chest is healthy and productive after you have a chance to cool down in self-control and you have calmly thought about potential solutions.
Then when you are tested, or you’re cut off the road, you get to decide which road to take.
Choosing the higher road means letting go and that can seem weak to the ego-mind, but self-control is empowered strength.
If you’re conflicted or when you don’t know what to do, don’t do anything yet. Review so you can learn and have discernment next time.
Remember that tidbit of wisdom next time when you hesitate.
Because you can be certain you will be reminded again until the lesson is learned. Life is patient with us.
How To Change Your Deep Rooted Fear and Phobia
Fear and phobia is rooted in the small places we can operate from in limitation and sometimes ugliness.
We all can act saintly-kind if we choose, and the act allows good sides to birth. Love serves all.
With practice over time, ideally, we can even learn to let undesired “meant to protect you” entering thoughts just pass through without putting energy into them.
We don’t have to accept our thoughts as current truth such as an isolated traumatic experience.
We can just reject those non-helpful thoughts that don’t apply to our current situation and send them back to where they came from.
And we can connect the dots to our self-awareness for the next time. We can recognize our self-destructive patterns and question them.
Because when you realize and accept every thought isn’t yours, that’s when you can learn how to optimize and transform your life if you decide.
Maybe you do realize, but you haven’t accepted yet. Because to accept means you give up a part of your control.
Say Goodbye to Your Past Fear and Phobia!
Before my younger contact lens years, I had fear and phobia about the dark, lightning, thunder, and the deep waters just to name a few things.
They came from news stories I heard, scary movies I watched, and almost physically drowning in my backyard lake at 9 years old.
But first I had to get calm and lose the worry.
I conquered the drowning fear eventually by learning how to swim.
When you lose your deep fear, any surface panicking fear and phobia, you can learn to float as you become light and buoyant. And if you can float either on your back or your front, you can learn to swim and save yourself.
That summer I was able to enroll in swim lessons but didn’t successfully learn how to float.
Then one day I was in the shallow end of a neighborhood pool, and I was calm and tried to float. Something clicked and I learned how to float on my belly and my back in the pool water.
It wasn’t pretty as I just laid there like a piece of driftwood letting my feet slowly float from the bottom of the pool.
But that day gave me confidence as I repeated floating again and again until I unintentionally could convince and remind myself (and my mind) that I knew how to float.
Fast forward to my young adulthood… most of my childhood phobias had disappeared or I had learned to swim out of them.
I still had fear and worry about so many real-life situations.
One was I had learned to grow scared of sharing.
I didn’t grow in share vulnerability times so that re-enforced my being a private person.
Writing blog posts like this and sharing on the internet was not something I would have ever done back then.
But instead of letting the fear get to me and grow in me, I slowly one-small step at a time turned those moves into action and transformation.
Since I faced my fear, I got over the hump to the other side and then I could replace my old fears.
But I learned to lean on faith to gradually change my Vata ways and worried thinking.
When I had the realization opportunity to cross the bridge into knowing there’s a divine source inside you decades later, there was an exchange into believing in more than my ability only.
There was new weightlessness like the thick clouds had lifted. I wasn’t the sole source for my success and I stopped believing in luck as coincidence without meaning.
I became a Believer that applied deeper insight to life, which did the heavy lifting to transform fear. In faith you know there’s another better life coming.
…What if this life were just a test?
And if you’re still wondering what this life is about, testing the waters in your quiet, thoughtful life is a good way to discover. What if there was more, and you were missing out?
This is an individual question, but when you seek, you will find.
“You become what you think about all day long.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
How Faith Can Play a Solution Role
To take one step further, gaining faith can transform your beliefs and mental health, and especially if you have an anxiety disorder or a traumatic stress disorder.
When you believe that all things are possible in a larger context, then you can believe that fear is beyond you and your power.
Fear can feel like an uncontrollable problem. If you can problem-solve with from within then you have a powerful way.
Norman Vincent Peale’s The Power of Positive Thinking was a classic book published in the 1950s.
He was a motivational thinker so ahead of his time because he was already suggesting meditation and mind-body correlation in his works.
There’s a 10-step practical process in the book’s chapter “Power to Solve Personal Problems.”
It includes: believe for every problem there is an answer, pray about your problems, trust in your insight and intuition, and do creative spiritual thinking for amazing power answers.
If Mr. Peale were still alive today, he would be a great forward-thinking influencer with much to say.