love over ego Archives - Healthy Happy Life Secrets

Rumination Is Keeping You Stuck

Rumination is something I know a lot about. It’s a form of overthinking and worry that can come from deep-rooted fears.

Feeling fear is an opportunity for your (subconscious) ego to get a hold of your thoughts and mind.

…That can keep you playing small in your precious life that you’re the star in 🌟and uniquely play out.

Opposing efforts are the ego fears showing up that are the opposite of love. …And loving thoughts and actions.

…So cutting them out is a good personal growth mission.

And that’s not something you would likely have learned in school or in your work life. And actually, probably picked up more ego behaviors along the way than pushed them aside.

But when you get to the bottom of your fears and you’re aware in conscious living in your life journey, that can help you conquer fears.

…That lets you have more love to give. And when you love yourself (first), then that invites in more love you can offer to the world in abundant ways and mindset.

Sometimes you end up going down unproductive storyline rabbit trails that turn into a negative spiral loop. That’s when you want to reset… or else risk staying stuck.

Resetting our minds by taking a walk, getting on a yoga mat, journaling, flipping the script, replacing thoughts, or doing other productive exercises are healthy intentional steps.

Because bad thoughts are usually counterproductive in some way. And negative (unloving) thoughts always hurt.

But taking a few mindful present thought moments can help the reset. When you pause and take a deep breather… you have a small window to make a positive micro shift adjustment in your day.

Because deep breathing in and out sends fresh oxygen to the mind, resets the body, and helps clean out the cobwebs from growing in the soul… 💨

The soul is at the seat of your mind, will (choices), and emotions that are deep within the body.

You can invite in your spirit to help lighten the load.

But not all of us do.

You get to exercise that right (choice).

Taking deep breaths is a good habit, reminder, and first step.

It’s also a natural cure for uncontrollable heart palpitations that can come from anxiety.

If you’re a natural Vata body (Ayurvedic dosha), you know exactly how that feels in you as you’ve lived it throughout your life. And those around you with similar bodies, have too.

And when you do deep breathing exercises like 4-7-8 breathing, counting is even easier than yoga or meditating.

It’s an empowering habit you can do anytime and anywhere.

And that helps to counteract triggered rumination thoughts that appear in your day out of nowhere…

That’s this life… where at any moment when life is in play, anything can happen.

And this article may be useful to add more calm in your life by making aware of your ruminating thoughts occupying daily space.

You can tell them to take a hike and make them go away sooner. 😊

…Because it is up to you!

And that should feel good.

Even if and especially if you’re naturally more of a thinker and you like to analyze situations.

You’re often impacted more by rumination thoughts because you tend to get inside your head.

…It’s not your fault or anyone’s fault for how you were naturally built.

That’s what sets you and I apart from animals and our plant-based world we nicely co-exist with.

And to use our higher and super powers to rule our planet for good, we need healthy mindset practices.

So that for unsettled situations, our minds will search for better answers.

We can bypass the rabbit trails and potential misery.

Because unawareness = unconsciousness… and awareness = consciousness.

And connecting the dots… unconsciousnesss means our subconscious takes the wheel and that’s where the harmful ego can rear its ugly head.

Turning thoughts into incessant rumination that can affect our entire day and outlook beyond.

Until we stop them dead in their tracks.

Because naturally they don’t stop on their own in a cycle.

The ego protection (that you don’t need most the time) wants you to believe in make-believe. And in its harmful destruction, ego wants you to hold onto bad and unloving thoughts… or else something bad will happen.

That’s hardly the truth.

The opposite will happen…

Where losing rumination, you’ll get your healthy day back and bypass your misery.

When I was growing up, we listened to cassette tapes. And sometimes the tapes got stuck in the player, and then would play the same riff over and over again.

…Until we stepped in and did something about it. We had to turn off the tape player temporarily and fix the problem.

The problem was usually that the playing tape got wrapped around wrong. And when we’re aware, we’d take a pen and roll back the tape around until it was back in line inside the cassette… that would be a good thing to do with our triggered thoughts. 💭

And if the cassette was too damaged, then we could do small repairs like cutting the tape out (…remember that? Those were the days 😊).

We’d tape the good parts together and have a new restored tape.

If successfully done, the tape would be missing the cut out music tape parts that never was as noticeably dramatic as we thought.

And that’s how our thoughts can be. If we cut out bad parts, we’re fixing our bad tapes playing repetitive, non-productive rumination messsages in our heads.

Simple fixes and exercises take seconds to restore back to the healthy.

Where changing thoughts is healthy self-help. 🎉

You’re then no longer a prisoner to your thoughts… unless you allow thoughts to take you captive.

No one in this life comes out with perfect thoughts or are unscathed in this life… but the more practice in changing thoughts, the better you get at it.

And the sooner you feel better, the sooner you learn contentment and joy from happiness within that you’re in control of.

…NOT controlled by external daily situations that life serves up.

It’s your loving lens and perceptions that make the difference… and how you will get more outta this life!

Ego is the wildcard we have no control over.

Except when we’re conscious, then we can kick our subconscious (ego) to the curb.

We can turn to LOVE and our self-serving thoughts (positive thoughts).

So now that that’s clear, BE on close guard.

ALWAYS.

Even if you’re busy, don’t let your guard down.

Slow your life down.

And specifically slow your thoughts down.

Pause.

Don’t react.

And practice saying, “let me think (or pray) about that.”

This is language that your ego hates as this doesn’t let you knee-jerk react (or in some cases if we’re honest, act like a jerk).

If you choose love, you won’t mess up.

Always choose love.

That’s always easier. You don’t have to discern or figure out what you should do in life’s many gray areas and situation you’re part of.

If it feels loving and positive, then you know you’re headed in the right direction somehow, even if you’re not certain how.

It doesn’t matter who or where you are! This works with the love from above. And pays off on earth.

Oh, and always remember, you are loved.

Ego Block Removal For The Life You’re Meant to Live

I share a lot about internal happiness because that’s the forefront journey I’ve been on.

And the number one reason I have found of why people aren’t living happy is an ego block that can steal one’s daily happiness.

An example of this is with people who strive for perfection…

But most people don’t come out and say they are perfectionists. It’s a vulnerable admittance to share. So if you are one or know someone who is, you can probably relate to this.

Where the opposite of perfection is imperfection.

And we’re all imperfect on this planet, so perfection is a pie-in-the sky illusion.

For one, we all forget at some point (maybe regularly) so that automatically shows our minds ability to be imperfect.

Our minds can even foil us to believe that we’re not imperfect if we forget once or twice. That complicates matters.

And that’s due to our ego or an ego block that’s present but invisible to the eye.

If we focus on what’s not perfect, we can obsess.

Or we focus on all the wrongs in this (and our) world instead of what’s right and going well.

…That’s the harmful ego’s way, and we get to flip the script and choose to outsmart our ego.

A common scenario can be where we have what we want in front of us, and then milliseconds in, we want something else… when the perfect thing (whatever it is that we wanted minutes ago), is staring at us in the face and our minds are now telling us differently.

Again, generated by deceiving ego that backfires in its plot line to protect us, as often we don’t need that coat of protection.

AND we don’t need those crooked evil forces that have a hold on us or show up in self-defeating (imposter) ways.

BUT we buy into unless we are aware.

Another way ego slithers into our daily lives is when we do or say things that gets others’ approval instead of the acts that we deeply know in our heart is best and our higher evolved selves would be proud of.

…But it’s not our fault.

It’s our ego construction that’s built that way by design.

This helps us in Life to keep evolving.

Because if things were perfect (or perceived as perfect by us), we would stay the same when we are meant to grow into better beings.

So this is what we should know:

We have an ego in our minds that can creates chaos.

It’s our job responsibility to manage our ego for our better lives.

The ego is one thing that makes us all human on earth.

But the scariest part of it all is that most people in this world walk around unaware of the fact of their 24-7 ego influences… and mostly because it’s not visible like a red traffic sign. 🛑

We can’t see the ego influence in minute by minute play because we think it is us and our thoughts. We buy into the lying ego thought narratives.

And the only way out (and our saving grace) is in our choice to be aware and observe our thoughts and actions… and deliberately choose better or opposite ways.

Positive vs. negative.

Love vs. fear.

Productive vs. unproductive.

Worry vs. faith.

Peace vs. chaos.

Contentment vs. wanting what isn’t meant to be.

Joy vs. self-pity.

Responsibility vs. blaming others…

And if we choose to live uninformed, we stay unaware when poked… like when we were immature children and didn’t know any better.

When immature, we lack knowledge and stay ignorant that our ego will use to pull us in the wrong direction and push our buttons that hurts us and often others.

In nanosecond blinks, we can have a sharp reaction coming from our subtle and deep insecurities.

It can happen so quickly… someone cuts us off or does something to trigger us, or we turn on the negative news that widely opens the door to ego entering.

Unhealthy ego can seem so ordinary to us because when we don’t know that there’s another way to live that’s optimally higher… we keep ourselves living small.

Changing our thoughts daily is healthy.

And I believe 💯% needed for our mental health and for a kinder world to live in.

Like me, you probably weren’t schooled on this. No one you respected growing up taught you this. And if anything you were taught to BOOST your ego because you got praises and awards.

Our biggest defense is constant awareness and to fight off the mood sources that our world around us creates and show up to ourselves as the better half.

Live in a positive mental bubble with both feet on the ground knowing this world is imperfect.

…And you can be part of the solution.

You can bring a smile and more love, help others, and help yourself so you can help others.

Resist your awakened ego that automatically has a mind of its own and can fire itself up any time you’re awake.

…And fuel you with its hidden agenda that can subtly derail your better path in the moment.

And it gets missed…

Because the ego feeds us warped garbage when we’re half-mindlessly scrolling on the phone or watching a show to escape.

…And that’s our common cultural ways.

It’s easy when the world outside is noisy and there are busy distractions for the ego to have its power on us, instead of us being empowered.

…Like when you have an intent to have better eating habits, exercise regularly, or a prayer life and it doesn’t happen.

And not because there’s not enough time or energy in the day, because we all have the same time and we fit in what we want to do at the end of the day (and by the end of the day when our head hits the pillow).

We can have a number of daily excuses… but the bigger overarching reason is because our ego thoughts derailed us… and we allowed that.

When we’re unfocused, rather we choose to prioritize self-care, nature’s gentle sounds, relaxation, and reset centering time to gain our focus back and to hear the nudging whispers that’s our better lifeline.

…And that sends ego (loud thoughts) back packing into the little corner it belongs in…

Until the next time, when you’ve caught on maybe just a little quicker and do the same restore or similar remedy.

Turn your ego weakness (that we all have) into your strength.

Ego is not your friend, it’s a part of you that you can turn to good.

If your ego keeps you up all night (worry thoughts, anxiety, and stress) or keeps you from being daily productive, do something proactively different and healthy to acknowledge and commemorate that ego no longer has a hold on me.

Get those inside warm and fuzzy feelings back.

Today is a new day.

Tell yourself: “I can’t get back yesterday or get back my sleep” but I can live alive today in awareness. Oh, and btw little ego, you’re outta here!”

…Because I’m here now, and I’m choosing to take the fork in the road of the better life.

And the reason I’ve wised up to our ego’s way, besides that I’m a human 😊 is that…

In my own life experience, it was years of personal suffering and beating myself up in self-pity for the smallest things that nooboodddy was thinking about except for moi … and that helped me to see what I see today and in this ripe adult time in my life.

But for yearsss, I walked around with my head in a bubble, letting repeated tapes run in my mind about life situations.

I was anything but present in the moment, and that’s the worst feeling because it sucks the life energy out (when you could’ve spent that time productively exercising or reading a book).

But ego trickster spins the idea that’s how our (as in ego and my) brain works.

“Uh-no thank you,” says my evolved self.

But back then, I didn’t not know how there was a better way or how to shut those lesser ways off (and that’s how it is for most of us living with a blind ego).

Learning to exercise higher thought mind muscles is not as easy as lifting 20 lb weights.

I didn’t know better mind-body ways to help lift myself out of the fog.

So I had no fighting chance in the beginning unaware.

But in this life, there’s higher help that lifts the fog eventually and provides revelation.

And in my case, a spiritual intervention.

…Only after some years passed from that point did it click why some people I encountered in my past acted incongruent at times.

In some of those situations, I felt blindsided by their actions and the ripple effects caused.

…And being fully objective, maybe some people felt that way about me with some of my actions earlier on in life when I didn’t know better and they never told me.

I used to think the unproductive conversations were differences in opinions or personality.

But then there were times when with the same people, we could agree to disagree. So I wondered what made the difference…

And the common intersection I got epiphany on was that the ego was at peace or acting out.

And the fully formed ego theory I now know as truth, I believe is the cause of most people problems (…and yes affects everyone in the world).

…It’s like the close family and friends that talk about their past that they never got past, or who gloat about their former glories in a seemingly storytelling-engaging way… but is ego in disguise.

And you know it’s ego because in those ego moments the high ego has to get their point, story, or agenda across. And it’s not to help others.

All of us who have been around everyday people have come across these situations where we unknowingly helped egg their ego on.

…And then as more proof that ego was the problem, there were situations where someone declared that so-and-so had a high ego (that’s unhealthy) or the high ego person even admitted it themselves.

But our own ego dismissed that information tidbit at the time said because that’s not when the high ego person is acting up… They’re acting cool and humble.

…So our minds dismiss that admission and never files away that piece of information because to the brain receiving, it’s like: what do I do with that information that doesn’t have any attached action or outcome? The statement is misaligned with the action.

So we miss the high ego signs, and keep allowing ego offenders in our lives to keep offending.

Bottomline: what we can do here is work on our own mental health-iness daily, constantly stay aware, and create our own self-happiness life story.

We can keep our own high ego at-bay that’s wanting to burst out.

It’s definitely worth the effort to be on guard of our ego and check in with our thoughts, feelings, actions, and reactions for our peace, so we don’t waste our productivity that includes our day’s joy.

And, have compassion for those who are still unaware.

We can love them and walk away from their toxicity.

Btw, this wasn’t the healthy post of what I was going to share this week, but I felt my spirit encouraging me even when the ego tried to block some words from me.

Have a happy week! 😊

Love Over Ego For Extraordinary Life

Love over ego has never been so needed in our world of multi-dimensional complexities and chaos.

If we were able to act in love in every one of our situations and everyone did the same, then our planet would be a place of peace.

And in our smaller world we live in, it’s easier to find daily love amid our joy that we get with peaceful and feel good micro moments. Like when we have chocolate dipped strawberries. 🍓

Enjoyable moments help us get through our challenging situations.

…That can happen daily and in everyday moments.

One big reason is because the ego strikes for no rhyme or reason, and shuts out love. But we’re equipped to override this from happening.

In my journey, I discovered this phenomenon from my office working life situations where I was tested and I sometimes saw two sides in people… almost like a head and a tail side of a coin.

…One minute, a person could be acting pleasant and then the next minute, not.

You probably know what I mean…

Someone is triggered or irritated by something someone else says or does.

At the time of witnessing this, I thought these types of recurring scenarios with different people and situations were because of personality differences… or if it happened often with the same person, a personality clash.

💡But then later got revelation: that was only part of the problem.

The root problem is that all of us have a built in brain ego-feature that doesn’t act when we want. And can act up in our minds.

And we have the choice to choose self-awareness and to find love over ego.

Those are the two sides of the coin.

Love is love and ego represents fear.

Love is more obvious to us, and ego and fear are not. So that makes ego super dangerous.

Fear can be triggered in anyone at any time. Fear can show up as subtly as insecurities that cause irrational decisions to be made.

But if we replace fear with joy inside us or in our spirit, then we can revert to love that’s in us.

Either way, it’s no one’s fault as we’re all damaged goods in an imperfect world.

No one living is perfect, but our damaging ego in us wants us to believe we are in some way.

So getting that deeper love message into our core is our ticket out of fear-based living… that’s all the things we’re scared and worried about in this world.

But first we want to heal what’s broken inside us.

If we never get through our pain and suffering that still needs healing from the past, then we have wounds that show up as resentment and unforgiveness that’s not love.

In my life, I didn’t even know early on that I needed past healing until I did self-help reflection and shadow work inviting in love.

I could’ve let clouds hang over because that’s how the ego thrives.

I didn’t know there was another way.

And anyone who you come across who hasn’t declared healing from their past is living in some form of their ego cloud when clear blue skies ahead are available. 🩵

My early goals in life was to come out unscathed. Or I should say that was my naive ego goals.

…But I didn’t even get past my early 20’s before I knew every bucket area of my life was off… nothing was as I thought it should be as an adult. I measured myself against those around me, my culture’s shoulds, and what my ego led me to think.

The biggest problem is the ego voice and personality is usually the loudest in the room in us and around us. Ego blocks out quieter spirit whispers and ideas of what would be best and most loving.

…So back to my past office work situations, I did not understand what was happening to the person sitting in front of me.

It felt surreal what I was experiencing as unpleasantries and the tone coming from their mouths.

And I found this could occur in personal situations with immediate family. So it wasn’t just work bosses.

Ego infected moments were all over this world… and destructive.

And even the most unaware affected are aware they are not happy and causing destruction in relationships. It’s a sad way to be.

A way to stay clear from being run by your ego and causing damage is asking: what did I do to contribute to this? How can I change the future from repeating?

How can I bring back love into this situation?

Another way is to get informed such as from an article like this.

This shines light and responsibility to making a positive change and seeking personal growth in an imperfect world.

Otherwise the past never gets healed and no healing growth happens.

Then the ego continues to deeper infect and spin perception of reality for a lifetime if allowed.

🌟Good news is, anyone can end this destructive ego pattern in them if they also choose to be better internal listeners, and let in love over ego no matter what siutuational triggers they receive.

Committing to be a better person is one good motivator.

You can’t change others, but you can positively affect your life one situation and moment at a time.

The Seeking Love Over Ego Opportunity (Or Challenge) For You…

🌱Commit to evolve quicker and embrace change.

🌱Identify with your loving self because you are loved.

With those loving mindsets, you move your sails toward a greater future destiny, even when you don’t know what that is.

🌱Let down your guard sometimes.

What If you let yourself be vulnerable?

Let in new better ways… remember, you can always go back to the old ways that weren’t working well. 😉

Show up as the lovely person that people refer to as kind or doing good. They’re the ones that attract others and have a happy life because they live aligned.

With lovely attitudes, there’s no room for ego plays.

🌱Find your love over ego in situations.

This bypasses unproductive anxiety, fear, and worry that rob joy.

Reset by going to bed early could be the remedy for a bad day. A good night’s rest is known cure for getting more loving thoughts.

🌱We can openly talk about more adding love (and less ego) in everyday life instead of making it an “elephant in the room” because it’s not exciting to talk about and ego conceals itself.

If we brush aside our ego fears but let those eat at us, then we pay the price and the people around us suffer too.

“Love” spelled backward is “evol” and when we add more love with “ve”, we get evolve. And we shut out fears.

And, these are loving life goals we can consider:

Seek meaningful work for a satisfied life.

That can be easier to find and do if we disconnect weekly from our noisy surroundings, so we can listen to what our inner self is trying to tell us is best for us.

When we re-strategize and are willing to pivot with a little risk, we get to live out our best life and the world around us gets the best of us.

Choose to live love on purpose.

We can focus on love that is healthy.

For ladies, think of yourself as a ladybug. There are 5,000 species despite similar appearance.

Our destiny was there even if we couldn’t see it fully. We had a few red ladybug stripes.

Before we became our ladybug selves, we went through a caterpillar metamorphosis.

Through younger struggle and experiences, we became our full potential selves. We saved plants on our journey as our loving work on our planet. 🪴

We also showed up lovely and cutely clothed with ladybug matching black polka dots. We’re admired and even called good luck. 🐞We added more love tho this world.

That’s what our life legacy and relationships can be like. 🧡