Tired, Frustrated, Overwhelmed + Almond Ice Cream Sandwich

Tired, frustrated, or overwhelmed feeling as shown in this word cloud are general feelings many of us have.

But you don’t have to stay tired, frustrated, or overwhelmed. It’s the start of a new season and you can transition into your best season (no matter your situation). You can handle it with grace if you stay conscious of your attitudes and what you’re focusing on.

How you react is a direct determinant of how you perceive and interpret your situation.

Today’s blog post (and it’s a big one) is all about your different tired, frustrated, or overwhelmed feelings that bubble up when triggered that arise from some form of dissatisfaction (or trigger) in your life. I’m gonna share how to put those non-serving feelings aside so you can LIVE fully!

And that can start with a recipe that cools and refreshes.

If you’re tired overall, then I’ve also got a tea beverage that’ll help put a pep in your step (especially if you have a Kapha imbalance). So keep on reading…

But – just a little side warning upfront: this is a long (and maybe deep) blog post. I didn’t intend for this to turn into an article-length piece, but I’m very passionate about the topic of balance restoration (having suffered in my ways before with unfulfilling work), so I believe that this is useful information for those who want it (and the data is showing people are feeling overwhelmed and frustrated these days).

So to further help with exhaustion and offer some tired relief in the way I know that works, I’m providing some know-how advice and practical nuggets of wisdom that I picked up along my journey.

I chopped up the blog article down into 4 main sections and here are some of the highlights:

Section 1: I explain how feelings can guide you and share what you could productively do with your feelings, plus lessons I learned that can help you turn your life around from tired, frustrated, or overwhelmed feelings.

Section 2: I share how to turn your feelings around with your thoughts and two revelations that changed my life (and since the tennis U.S. Open just ended, I use an analogy from the sporting event to describe how you can improve your thought life).

I also share with you some of my lifelong learner ways you can use to help you turn your life around from tired, frustrated, or overwhelmed feelings. And I explain how to reset your life now to a better path of possibilities.

Section 3: You can learn how to change your moods (whether they’re daily or seasonal moods) and how to use your time wisely with a break pause in your day (and life).

I include plenty of peppery questions you can ask yourself to get to the heart of the matter and find yourself in  this season, along with oodles of examples throughout (so be sure to read it all and come back if you need to take a break!)

…and then finally in Section 4:  you can learn how to change your perspectives from the tired, frustrated, or overwhelmed lens.

And I wrap up with some joy and inspiring ways you can look forward to your season and the upcoming  4 seasons.

So be ready to be encouraged and if you’re ready, grab a beverage and here we go!…

Section 1: Feelings Help Guide You (And You Are NOT Your Feelings)

First (as you know) your circumstances don’t define you. Your identity is not wrapped up in what you’re been dealt with or even how you feel moment by moment.

“This too shall pass” is true. Everything and every feeling is temporary in this life’s design… The key to unlocking any stuck feelings is to know that there is a next moment that has hope and happy possibilities. Be okay with that as you’ve seen it before in the details of your life. Or turn stuck feelings into excitement (as I often do) about the adventure and good-surprise elements.

You can keep the celebrational moments alive in your happy memories and by creating new inspired ones.

And you can help make draining moments disappear by what you do next (and by default, what you ignore and the good feelings you hold onto).

Your feelings won’t go anywhere without you, so you’re best to deal head-on with any sour ones holding you back so you can move on. When I was about 20 years old, I ran away (from my life-then) to live at the beach for a summer college break. I soon realized that my problems just followed me and I delayed my progress. I needed answers but getting space wasn’t how I would find them (like in a purposeful sabbatical).

Back then, I also learned a valuable lesson in my up and down roller coaster emotions… my unhappiness was all situation-based and allowing my feelings to linger…  I had very little control over my hormonal emotional imbalances. As decades rolled on, I learned I had more power inside me than I knew on the surface. I think those starting adult years made me realize I didn’t have it together (despite what my ego told me) and that led me to think that I was missing something in life. Like whole big parts and pieces!

And I was smart to keep searching (even with my dimly lit flashlight as a guide) for a better path, in hopes to find something better.

And that started me on a journey into finding the real identity that I was born to become but strayed from along my teenage and young adult years. Back then, I didn’t see trials as meant to help me grow into the person I wanted to be.

Somewhere along the line, you may have come to your realization that you were meant for more than what you’re (or were) currently doing. That’s how I felt all along in my corporate work-life journey. And I discovered what was holding me back.

When I got out of playing it safe, a whole new world of possibilities opened.

This life is what you make it and you have a big say in what happens in the rest of your life besides what you know you’ve already been dealt.

Be and stay curious. Take a double-take and look again. And with your desire to know, you will gain wisdom. And in your boldness and decisions, you can take baby step moves that will change the direction of your life.

Your past can be the ticket to how you arrived at where you are and where you’re going, and who you are in this big (and become a bigger) wide world. But that’s not who you will be. And you are not at your final destination.

If you’re frustrated with the direction of your life, then now is a GREAT time to make that pivot as the world is working on solving problems that won’t go away without our human intervention.

If you’re spending time on night activities that you don’t feel like are helping you, then question that. In my college and younger days, I used to go to clubs with friends as that was a popular late-night pastime– to be social and have fun. But, I never really felt at home in those places or at parties, and after a long night, I just wanted peace and quiet. But, I’m glad I went through those phases and seasons because I know I’m not missing anything. 

And so if you’re feeling tired, frustrated, or overwhelmed in your season, and a bit clingy to what you’ve been avoiding or holding onto a little longer than you should, be encouraged to try something different. Do it for yourself and not for what others think. You may surprise yourself with your new interests without a critic or judge on your shoulder.

And I believe that if you do things that others don’t do or understand (but you feel like this is what you’re supposed to do now to grow), then you’re on the right track to finding what completely lights you up. This life is too short to live out someone else’s desires and dreams.

If you need encouragement for trying something good and new for you, because no one else you know is doing it (or you’re getting little support), tell yourself you deserve better. Because you do! And go ahead and explore. You were put here for a reason. Find your reason in this season.

You’ve made it this far in life so quitting (or playing safe, e.g. small) now would make little to no sense. Unless it’s the thing you want to change.

Two revelations, mantras, or whatever you want to call it, changed the course of my life. They are:

“All we have is now, so live in this moment.”

And, “what you believe, you become.” 

That’s it. I had these two thoughts enter my higher intellect on no one particular day and just never left. Those words take up more residence in my daily mind than any self-defeating talk. There’s no room for an Impostor. I don’t have time for that… ya know what I mean!?

…and there’s no room for an Impostor in your life! I’m serious about that. Because the clock is ticking and you want to make every 24-hour day count.

And once you realize that (as I did and maybe you already do), you never go backward if you have a genuine desire to grow. Putting on a lifelong learning hat along with a life vest (for living fully) will save you whenever you don’t know what to do. Because you know you can figure out how along the way if you have a desire, without missing a beat. Each step will help guide you.

I KNOW I never want to go back to reliving my life like a caterpillar (as I often refer to in my earlier years), as flying around and seeing the roses from above is so much better (and keeps improving).

Like a butterfly, I only stay where it serves me and those around me. I look forward and put energy into the thoughts I want to become, which serve my highest and best use purposes. I let go of what doesn’t help me and pass that message on to those I mentor for their lives. I stopped caring so much for things I could not change as that was holding me back. Does that resonate with you?

Section 2: Changing Your Thoughts

It starts with your thoughts. Here’s an analogy and you might like if you watch or want to learn more about tennis…

The U.S. Open tennis championships just ended.

Imagine the tennis players are in play and waiting for the ball on the court to be returned to them in a few short moments (similar to a thought that pops into your mind).

Some tennis ball returns (or thoughts) are easy for the players to process, like a straightforward back-and-forth ball rally…  and then some plays are a bit trickier and require more skill like fast running, quick thinking, and sudden change in hand-eye coordination (e.g. multi-layer subconscious thoughts).

In either play scenario, the players (or you and your mind) usually have enough time to split-second decide where the ball (your thoughts) will land or at least in the general court vicinity (your general outcome).

If the players start to lose one point after another (or you get negative thoughts), then they can get on a losing streak (non-serving thoughts pull your mood and emotions down). Finding a way to change their negative thoughts (into a positive mental state) to pick themselves back up, is the strategy they can use to turn it around (and you can too with your ability to change your thoughts at any thought that enters).

Pro tennis players use their brains to do one thing, to focus on winning the point with their winning returns. That’s what I’m saying to you, focus on helping yourself win no matter what you’re sent as thoughts and how you’re currently feeling in your game of life.

…The other big change I did and do (like over the past 18 months), is I surround myself with those that will help me grow. I don’t spend time with those who want to relive their glory days over and over again.

Lifelong learners also don’t gossip about people they know or don’t know, and they don’t complain because negative energy diverts from growth. This can require a shift in the way you do things, as it did for me. I didn’t start out wise! And, based on these shortlist criteria I have for friends, my friends have changed (or else made a change ;-)).

These days we’re bombarded with information overload so most people don’t have time to re-tell or listen to retold stories from just anyone. If there’s a good lesson to be learned, then people will listen, and I’m all ears.

Often the wisdom isn’t in the HOW they made their achievement, it’s in their growth evolvement. What they did may not work for you or me. But what steps they took to change their path, can be life-giving advice.

An example of this is someone like Marie Forleo who has stayed relevant practicing what’s going on these days.

With a wise mindset, you too can become the fullest person you were meant to be. And live the best life today… and that starts by changing your moods (just like you can change your thoughts).

Section 3: Changing Your Moods

When you feel a heavy cloud over you, maybe it’s cloudy outside or you just feel the weight of the world on your shoulders with no end in sight…

In those moments, take yourself out of your natural tendencies to follow your mood. If you’re working on a project, finish it. if that’s easier said than done, plow through your mood with determination and then reward yourself with a break.

And if you’re tired and need a break, then pause to get some inspiration. Watch a video or exercise, and then come back to your work. By not putting guilt on yourself for any next step take, you free yourself from judgment (and any negative self-thoughts).

And if none of those ways work, take the afternoon and evening off, also guilt-free.  

But, in that time, promise or owe it to yourself to be an observer of yourself. Be self-aware and act like a lifelong learner even if you’re not sure if you’re there yet. (Remember, you become what you believe.)

Capture your mood thoughts on paper or in notes on your phone as you’re relaxing, so you know what you felt and how you turned it around and can replicate or improve the next time. In a learner mindset mode, I can tell you this: you want to strive, win, and self-improve.

If your tired and dull moods are happening often, and you need to change your seasonal mood, ask yourself bigger picture questions:

What do I see myself doing 5 years from now? What do I want to do (if you could do anything in the world)? What do I want to accomplish in 2 years? Write it down. When you stay aspiring, that keeps your mind positive, hopeful. And you want to do more with yourself. Your outlook improves.

And you may just pleasantly surprise yourself when you come up with an A-ha answer during those seasons you weren’t feeling energized. That has happened to me more times than I can count on my hands when I let in the space.

And that can be the way for you! Because you have more gifts and talents than you are using or maybe even aware of in busyness or tiredness…anyone who says they don’t have any gifts, I don’t believe them as we all have them and here’s how you can uncover them…

Revealing Questions To Ask On a Break (When You Make Time):

You could ask yourself: What was I good at as a child and in my teenage-highschool years? What clubs or groups did I like and belong to that I forgot about? Bring back those memories as they may have gotten buried. They may be the key to your next step as they were for me…

I was good at art and I learned French easily. I had belonged to and helped start business clubs and went to study business in college. So I knew those were going to be skills I would use in my future. But what I didn’t know was that I could sing as I didn’t have a singing voice as far as I knew. Actually, I’ve always been embarrassed to sing aloud in anyone’s company. I also never knew I could write. My senior English teacher put big red “x’s” and slashes in the handwritten papers I turned in. I had nice handwriting though 😊

My point is, you may just be tired of this season or the past 18 interrupted months, but in staying stale and there, you’re missing what YOU DO HAVE that you haven’t uncovered or let out its full potential yet. You have to do to unleash. OK, break time…

Tea Break

Your need mind breaks. Next time you take one (maybe that’s now to take a bathroom break)… here’s a good, put a pep-in-your step tea to try.

I like Stash Tea’s Ginger Fire Chai. I mix that with a little taming apple juice and that brings me to life. You can also substitute with their other apple flavors or Harney and Sons Hot Cinnamon Tea. The idea is to get a tea that has a kick to invigorate your mind. A cup of joe can work too.

…Anyway, when you get back to thoughts to change your moods, then write down all that you want to change about your current life.

And then write down all the things you love about your life. Focus on the areas of your life that GIVE you life (but don’t run your life)! It could be a hobby, a person, a pet, or a plant… something that inspires and energizes you.

As a Vata, I need constant stimulation. I change artwork and colors around my place. And even my nail polish colors. I watch baking shows like Nadiya Bakes or The Great British Baking Show (they have a new series coming out and Nadiya was on a past season in case you’re also a fan)… and these little things get me inspired to bake, create, or write again.

You know what ‘lil things are in your life that get you moving. Do snippets of them on your break.

…Maybe you want to do more of that in your life? (And less of the things that slow us down).

You know those days where life doesn’t go as planned. The family member that doesn’t behave or has an issue that involves you, the computer that goes on the fritz, a house emergency, and so many external situations that impact our day.

So one thing you could do right away is, lower your day’s expectations in your mind. Progress over perfection… we love this new accepted way… I know I do… amen! I rarely have a written to-do list beside me that used to be my (old) way. No list helps me to feel like I accomplished more as I recall the 1-3 important things I did and feel grateful. You could give this a try and see how it lands for you. I still journal and maybe that works for you.

Whatever way works for you, try to believe you’re doing more than you think. Here’s one way you can test this out…

Think of just one skill you want to work on today (and every day). Then just work on that one thing. If you do more on that effort, great!, and if you do less, there’s a new day tomorrow. Whatever the outcome, be your biggest cheerleader and congratulate yourself (even if all you did was pull out the supplies you’ll need for a project to work on your skill)!

Let go of the feelings that you have to control your time (or anyone else’s) And get out of the habit of half-listening to video or audio that’s not background noise… and stop listening to podcasts at 1-1/2 speed, lol.

Smart learners absorb what they are hearing and then with active listening, apply the ideas in their life. It’s the ego that each of us has that wants to check boxes and cross off lists.

Unique, good ideas take time to form, and if your brain is being used as a mechanical tool to simply process and check boxes instead of fully listening, writing thoughtful notes, and considering, then all the good stuff is missed. A parrot can regurgitate what they heard, but not everyone can take the information they just learned and apply it intelligently to help themselves and others.

This is what I had to unlearn because in school that’s what they subconsciously train you to do to succeed. But you want to win in your life so unlearning these no-longer-needed habits will help you!

So you could instead leave more mind space and let your unique thoughts and desires guide you. A ‘lil encouragement nudge: you’re not in school or in your parents’ house anymore, so you don’t have to follow the rules. That can be very freeing if you lean into that idea and can help break you out of a natural tendency, rut, or pattern.

But keep the learner hat you held as a student where you’re always mindfully seeking the best way to grow, and that’s always changing.

You may not have the full capacity to listen to another module or learn another lesson now, and especially if you’re tired, frustrated, or overwhelmed. That’s okay.

So, go back at a better time. More time equals diminishing returns, but if you come back then it’s repleting returns. Focus on what makes you feel better at this moment and you’ll find your next. Be forgiving of yourself as you’ll do it all eventually if you put your mind to it.

If you feel tired, frustrated, or overwhelmed for more than a day or two, change your perspective.

This next and final section (we’re almost done here) is about how to do just that. You could have people in your life that depend on you, and you wish you had more freedom. Or a past draining or threatful situation that needs to be currently handled, or a new issue (relationship, health, work, etc.) that has become a hindrance… but you can do something about how you feel!…

Section 4:  Changing Your Perspectives

It’s our perspectives that make all the difference in the world. When you think and believe, it could be so much worse than what you’re dealt (or “why not you?”), you free yourself from those draining tired, frustrated, or overwhelmed feelings.

Maybe it’s reverse psychology on yourself, but it works. And it works 100% of the time if you apply it 100%. Being able to tap into your mind’s eye or imagination is a gift.

The more you can inspire your imagination, hope, and aspirations at any moment, the faster you can set yourself free from your tired feelings. You set yourself in a different state than the current frazzled or underwhelming one.

But actually, you are being in the moment with your thoughts, where there is no pain-body. As author Eckart Tolle so wisely taught in The Power of Now. Love that book.

Example: You wanted to leisurely travel this year but because of the world situation, you can’t or opted not to because of the risks. You could look at your decision as a positive one as you’re saving money and leaving room for other growth and opportunity-bearing areas. You could use your mind’s eye to imagine the places you want to go to and the places you’ve been so you can feel those places. You’re using this hopeful moment as a reference for your daydreams and nostalgia.

Here’s another example… if you grew up in my generation or before, you don’t take the internet’s capabilities for granted because we remember life before the internet.

Comparatively, life for me was boring at times without the resources we have now. Earlier days, we had books, TV, and radio. And my family didn’t have money to go to summer camp, so I had to get more creative. But I actually think that helped me become resourceful as an adult. Imagine someone who didn’t have half those things growing up, and what they would do with what they now have (not taking things for granted).

When you were growing up if you did have means or internet, then you can use those experiences to guide you further and into your better ways. It’s your perspective that changes everything, and not what you were given.

As adults living in 2020 and beyond, we can all listen to what’s going on around the world, in real-time. We can live vicariously, and get inspiration through social media channels.

It’s an amazing time to be alive. Do you see what I just did? I flipped around the situation so that it works for me (and everyone). I saw everything good now from an authentic lens I have of what life could be like or was like in the past. And you can do that and change your perspective with where you are at this moment.

Something helpful you can do is list out all the situations that are making you feel tired, frustrated, or overwhelmed (similar to the things you may have jotted down that you’re not satisfied with).

There could be a daily pain at your side that you may not have fully acknowledged and is lessening your current quality of life. It may not be urgent but it’s eating away at part of or the back of your mind. Because when you have complete peace of mind, you don’t feel anxiety, constant tiredness-ness, or frustration. It actually feels pretty darn good, right?

In your real-life scenario, you can learn how to bounce back whenever you feel tired, frustrated, or overwhelmed. And each time you practice, you get better and faster at it. Restoring yourself is a good life skill to know.

Try to set a bar to not get to a frustrating level because calm is your goal (for better outcomes and health). It’s desired as love is over fear.

I know this is possible because I transformed this area of my life and I’ve seen it in others who were determined to change traits they did not like about themselves or the results they were getting as a result of their emotions.  

To change this requires you to get deeply humble with yourself to grow into the person you want to be.

Final Thoughts (For Today Anyway) On How To Get Out Of Tired, Frustrated, or Overwhelmed

So say, you feel okay for part of the day, and then something, a time, event, or another trigger sets you off. That’s the moment you want to try something different. If you feel frustrated or irritated, take that irritation and do something relaxing. You could put on some nice music and make an energizing snack. 

You could straighten up around you. You could search for something that inspires you. Let go of and brush off the irritating thought you were holding onto. Flip it around. If someone offended you, think, they didn’t know or they’re hurting in some way I’m not aware of. There’s a time and a place to say something productive if the offense is repeated. You respect yourself and you have a higher perspective.

As I mentioned before, I care less because that helped me (and I show tough love when needed). You may need the same, or to care more. You know what will help you (or you’re smart enough to hire help).

For now, notice the season you’re in. Figure out and think about what you love in this season (it’s in between summer and fall at the time I share this).

For summer, I love the ocean views, warm photos, and fresh berries. In the fall, it’s the changing of the autumn leaves, the cooler outdoor weather, and apple cider.

In the winter, it’s the anticipation of a snow globe white Christmas, holiday foods, and music. And in spring it’s the birds chirping, all the greenery in bloom, and pastel peonies in May.

Find those things you love in the season you’re in that bring you joyful, reminiscent memories. Use your smell, sight, and sense of taste to guide you.

Get into the habit of doing this, so you can reset the tired, frustrated, or overwhelmed feelings with just your surroundings and your mind.

And then move into thoughts about what you DO HAVE instead of what you don’t.

Look around you. What do you see? If you’re at home, survey your space to see if you’re inspired by your environment. And if that’s the place that makes you feel tired, frustrated, or overwhelmed, go outside. Take a walk or a drive. Change the scenery.

No, that won’t change your life. When you return, you’ll feel good for a few minutes or hours, and then your reality will sink back in. Anticipate that (and don’t be disappointed knowing that’ll happen and when it does).

The Fourth and Final Suggestion (That You May Not Yet Have Explored)

Another way you may not know is how to specifically restore your body-mind with your resources and external senses. Depending on if you have more of a tired mind over a tired body or vice versa, you will want to lean into restoring what needs to be restored from your body-mind’s perspective that is not your perspective, or the one I mentioned above. This happens below your skin (and what you can see in the mirror) using your intuitive body-mind connection. The cool stuff, I get giddy over!

And once you know what to do, you will know how to restore your tired, frustrated ,or overwhelmed feelings and balance faster each time.

And if you think something is missing as I did in my mid-20s, then you could be in for a great life adventure. I hadn’t even scratched the surface of my potential back then.

There’s so much more in you than meets the eye.

Life can be exciting and nothing like how it started (caterpillar to butterfly). You get to rewrite each day that leads you to the path you take. Someday doesn’t have to feel far off in the distance if you can restore yourself to a happier place today and this lovely moment.

And that’s where I will end this mini-novella. I hope you can find your inspiration and restoration today and in this season! I’m always here to help. And if you have any thoughts on this, please feel free to leave a comment or drop me a line!